DeadBrain: Features - Christmas 2001

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Today on DeadBrain:
Premiership footballers to take gender tests
Britain closed indefinitely due to snow
Car crime statistics stolen from minister's car
Mugabe banned from playing cricket in UK
Call centres go on strike; robot overlords one step closer to domination
Ia splits from Serb in latest Balkan separation

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Christmas Carols
And so this is a New Labour Christmas (More abbreviated than something which is very abbreviated indeed)

And so this is Christmas,
And what have you done?
Another year over,
And a new one just begun.

And so this is Christmas,
And you did bugger all
For the near and the dear ones,
Nothing much at all.

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