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Designer MPs
3 Jan 2002
Conservative Party Chairman David Davis today announced a radical change in policy designed to help the party's chances at the next election. The new policy on human cloning was announced at a press conference held in a 2-star bed and breakfast in Blackpool.
According to Mr Davis, by allowing human cloning the party will increase their chance of winning elections, as teams of scientists will be employed to design the perfect MP. Calling the change "historic", Mr Davis went onto dribble slightly, before reassuring journalists the party is still "totally opposed to human cloning in all other circumstances. We just want this one exception so we have a cat in hell's chance of winning any seats".
Opponents were quick to condemn the Tories' new policy. Fighting his way through crowds of placard-waving pro-life campaigners, Labour MP Douglas Ramsbottom mumbled something incoherent, while Liberal Democrat spokesman Gregory T Mullet "screamed because he wanted to go faster" on the dodgems.
Go on, have a look at this...
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