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Bush disappointment at Zimbabwe result
15 Mar 2002
Supporters of President Bush are this week "very disappointed" following the re-election of Robert Mugabe as President of Zimbabwe. Until this week, Dubya had been the winner of the election with the dodgiest result this millennium, a title he clung onto with pride. But, even Supreme Court battles and recounts in Florida were no match for Mubage's extensive use of violence and intimidation
Members of Zanu-PF, President Mugabe's party, were too busy "kicking the shit out of opposition supporters" to make a detailed comment, but a spokesman did say they were "well chuffed" with the result. The future of the Movement for Democratic Change is, however, unclear. Morgan Tsvangirai, the party's leader, was rumoured to be headed in the direction of management consultancy or after-dinner speaking, but considering Zimbabwe doesn't have business to manage or enough food to feed its own people, that seems increasingly unlikely.
Meanwhile, President Dubya has responded angrily to the likelihood that Mugabe will bring treason charges against Tsvangirai for allegedly plotting to kill him. Speaking into a bank of microphones and a loud speaker that he thought was switched off, Bush called Mugabe a "bastard" on live television, moaning "Treason? That beats the friggin war on terror then."
Excuse me, would you mind?
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