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DeadBrain HQ Attacked
1 Mar 2002
There was shock, surprise and marshmallows around the world last night as the headquarters of world-famous news satire website "DeadBrain" were attacked for the second time in its history. According to eyewitnesses, who were suitably drunk at the time, a mob of angry Ann Widdecombe supporters marched on the building wielding baseball bats and holding portraits of the Tory MP aloft.
The demonstrators then proceeded to pelt DeadBrain's headquarters and a nearby car park attendant with eggs, rotten fruit and a variety of highly explosive weapons, causing severe disruption to a crucial game of Twister going on inside. Following the attack, several vital services and the DeadBrain website were left unavailable for several minutes.
As daylight broke on the crime scene, detectives investigating the attack revealed that matters were more sinister than they first appeared. Chief Inspector Douglas Ramsbottom, who is leading the investigation, told DeadBrain that it was an inside job. "The man who led the attack was in fact a member of DeadBrain's forums," he said through a large megaphone. "Through our surprisingly limited intelligence, we have discovered that the man is known to the criminal underworld as 'Horner'. He is highly dangerous and should not be approached."
It is not yet clear what motivated the supporters of the Bring Back Ann Widdecombe Campaign to launch an attack on DeadBrain, but some over-pompous experts on crime have suggested that the attack could have been due to a recent decline in coverage of their campaign, or "just for the hell of it".
Go on, have a look at this...
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