| | Congo Negotiations Fail
24 Apr 2002
Negotiations between news satire website "DeadBrain" and the Democratic Republic of Congo have broken down at the last minute. Representatives from both sides had been meeting in the capital city, Brazzaville, to discuss formalising diplomatic relations. However, arguments broke out after one delegate insulted another's headdress.
"I just can't understand it," said Gregory T MacMullet, chief negotiator for DeadBrain. "I have worn this pink cowboy hat for the last fifteen years. Why on earth would anybody want to be so hurtful about it?"
Congo's negotiating team has declined to comment on the growing rift between the two sides, but one official did speak to us off the record. "I assure you that no harm was meant," he whispered from behind a small horse, adding: "But the guy did look like a bit of a twat."
UN Secretary General Kofi Annan refused to talk to us at length about the issue, as did England Manager Sven Goran Eriksson. However, it is understood that Ulrika Jonsson will be selling her story of the negotiations to a tabloid newspaper shortly.
No further contact is expected between the Congo and DeadBrain "for the foreseeable future", as both sides are "extremely pissed off". A spokesman for DeadBrain said that the failure to establish diplomatic relations was "a tragedy for democracy", but that they would "somehow soldier on".
How cool is this?
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