| | Hooligans prepare for start of season
10 Aug 2002
Hooligans across England are this afternoon preparing for the official start of the football violence season. After the initial disappointment of the World Cup, pre-season "uglies" went well and this season promises to be one of the most eventful in recent years.
Self-confessed "hard case" Douglas Ramsbottom, who fights for Darlington Violence Club (VC), told DeadBrain he was looking forward to the start of the season. "Yeah I can't wait," he said with copious amounts of spittle in an unnaturally deep voice. "I'm gonna really bash some heads in, rueeergh!"
Despite the fighters' obvious enthusiasm, though, football violence pundit Gregory T Mullet is doubtful about this season's success. In a cliché-filled interview with our man in the dugout, the great man said: "To be fair - and I'm always fair – to be fair, the fighters have got to give it 110% and I just don't think enough of them are capable of that this season. I'm hopeful, but at the same time I have to be very pessimistic."
Hey, look at this!
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