| | Heart attack risk reduced by removal
2 Sep 2002
The risk of having a heart attack could be significantly reduced by not having a heart, a team of scientists has found. According to a study carried out at Edinburgh University, anyone susceptible to having coronary problems could benefit from having their heart surgically removed at an early age.
Professor Douglas Ramsbottom, who led the study, said the team's findings could be of great benefit to many people. "I am certain that what we have discovered will be put to good use," he said at a press conference yesterday. "Of the thousand patients we tested, none of the ones without hearts had heart attacks. Granted, most of them were already dead, but we don't see that as a barrier."
Delegates to the World Summit in Johannesburg have meanwhile backed the scientists' findings. "We think this is very good news," said one Chinese delegate. "Perhaps this way we could kill two parrots with one rock: no more heart patients, and a reduction in overpopulation. It could help your NHS too, no?"
How cool is this?
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