| | Sniper police arrest white van, "Superman"
21 Oct 2002
Police investigating the mystery sniper terrorising the Washington area have reportedly arrested a man in a phone box, but deny that he is Superman. "I can see where the confusion has arisen," said a police source this afternoon, "but there is no evidence to suggest that he is Superman. For a start, if he was Superman he would have used his powers to get away, or his X-ray vision to see us coming. It's all a bit implausible."
According to US television, police also arrested the now infamous white truck they have been hunting for days at the same time. As DeadBrain reported two weeks ago, the white truck was considered "a serious suspect" after it was spotted at the scene of several of the shootings. Unlike "Superman", though, it is understood that the white truck was unable to take refuge in a phone box and was arrested outside a petrol station near Richmond, Virginia.
Dr Gregory T Mullet, an eminent police historian, told DeadBrain that this is the first time an inanimate object has been arrested. "It is very unusual, I certainly can't think of this happening before," he said. "The nearest comparable incident was in 1998 when police accidentally snatched a pair of Bill Clinton's trousers, but they let them go again after a few hours. They weren't exactly inanimate, either."
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