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Dubya's War

Iraq to begin missile destruction by firing them at Israel, US troops
Iraqi officials have pledged to begin destroying their banned al-Samoud II missiles "as soon as possible" in a letter to the United Nations today. The missiles, which were banned by the UN because of their extended range, were discovered by chief weapons inspector Hans Blix after he was taken to look at them being demonstrated by the Iraqis.

Despite being taken straight to them, Dr Blix described the missiles as "a significant find". "The Iraqis did a good job of hiding these missiles, I very nearly didn't find them," he said, standing in front of one of them. "But now I have I can see that they are in clear breach of disarmament obligations and must be dismantled immediately."

However, because of the cost of dismantling the missiles manually, a spokesman for the Iraqi government said that they intended to use an "automated destruction system", which involves firing them at Israel and any advancing American troops. "This is the quickest and easiest way to get rid of our missiles," he explained. "Taking them apart piece by piece takes months, but if we simply lob them over the border at Israel or somewhere it'll all be over in seconds."

The timetable for destroying the missiles may disappoint the UN, though. "We can fire them at Israel pretty much straight away if we want," the spokesman continued, "but we may have to wait a while before we can fire them at any American troops. The ball's in their court, really."

The White House was unavailable for comment.

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