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| News · Satire · Spoof · Parody · Humour · George W Bush |
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| You are standing next to: Home > News | 11th February |
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 Bush in "gay" nations controversy 3 Mar 2003 by Guy U.S. President George W. Bush stunned the world today when he described the United Nations as "gay". The impromptu address, at an army training camp in California, began when Bush remarked "United Nations? More like Gay Nations if you ask me." Seeing the assembled camera crews, the President went on to dub France, Germany and Russia the "Axis of Gay", and singled out France as "the gayest of them all". He concluded his controversial speech by saying: "The free nations of this world must defy the gay nations, and bomb the rogue nations!" The address was met with solemn applause from Private Tom Murray (3rd Infantry Division), the only American soldier who is not currently fighting terrorism, having been struck down by a mysterious pain in his left ankle, which the Pentagon claims "may be anthrax related". European reaction to the President's speech was largely unsympathetic. French President Jacques Chirac said that he had "no response" to allegations about his country's sexuality, while German Chancellor Gerhard Schröder went further, calling Bush "a turd". In London, Liberal Democrat leader Charles Kennedy attacked the British Prime Minister over his close relationship with the Bush administration. Kennedy cited the President's latest speech as "further proof of his rapid descent into lunacy" and said it was "something that should be of grave concern to the British people". Tony Blair replied by saying he understood the concerns of the British people, but found them rather tedious. In response to international condemnation of the now infamous "Axis of Gay" speech, White House spokesman Ari Fleischer read a prepared statement. "I can confirm that the President is quite probably a lunatic," said Fleisher. "However, I am confident that his condition does not affect his judgement. Scientific evidence shows that lunatics actually have a keener appreciation of the dangers of terrorism than ordinary people, and as such should be encouraged to start wars. The Administration's decision to go to war without the support of the Gay Nations is entirely logistical, and not an attempt to damage international relations." Related articles Bush beats Republican Guard after Florida recount 18 Apr 2003 Bush attempt to play snap with Iraq's most wanted cards fails 17 Apr 2003 US troops find weapons of Mass Disruption 16 Apr 2003 UK: Syria not next on list for invasion 15 Apr 2003 Pentagon to release Iraq sticker album 15 Apr 2003 Iraq Information Minister awarded comedy BAFTA award 14 Apr 2003 Rumsfeld: There's nothing wrong with a bit of looting 11 Apr 2003 US to ship in crowds of cheering people for Iraq victory celebrations 10 Apr 2003 Iraq information minister to release single 9 Apr 2003 Iraqis deploy shoes of mass destruction 9 Apr 2003 Rumsfeld: Saddam may use WMDs after death 7 Apr 2003 U.S. bombs BBC World Affairs Editor 6 Apr 2003 Baghdad airport captured, tourists expected in weeks 4 Apr 2003 Iraq gun amnesty unsuccessful 3 Apr 2003 Iraq complains of illegal American tactics 1 Apr 2003 Iraqis unimpressed by U.S. replacement for state television 28 Mar 2003 Bush bored with Iraq, declares war on France 27 Mar 2003 U.S. bombs "strategically-important" market 26 Mar 2003 Powell to sell Iraq reconstruction rights on eBay 24 Mar 2003 US to wipe out entire UK armed forces by end 2004 23 Mar 2003 War a ratings winner - better than EastEnders, say fans 22 Mar 2003 Bush achieves war aim #1: Iraq located and bombed 21 Mar 2003 Allied forces encounter "wrong kind of sand" 20 Mar 2003 Shock and awe display not that shocking or awe-inspiring 20 Mar 2003
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