News · Satire · Spoof · Parody · Humour · George W Bush
DeadBrain: Daily news satire, spoof, parody and humour
  You are humming to the tune of: Home > News23rd November 
 
News in Depth
Dubya's War

Bush beats Republican Guard after Florida recount
A triumphant President Bush today announced that the Coalition against Saddam Hussein had beaten Iraq's Republican Guard three days ago after all, following the publication of the results of a Supreme Court hearing and a recount in Florida. The final score in the war can now be revealed as Iraq 49-51 Coalition – "a clear victory" according to President Bush.

"At last we can be sure," he said at victory celebrations in Washington this morning. "The war is over and we won. No, we didn't just win, we won by a mile! This is a clear victory for the forces of good and proof that our army is supreme. It is also an unmisapprehensible mandate for all future conflicts that will show how good we are. So, who shall we invade next? Has anyone got a coin to flip?"

As secret service agents fought off crowds of anti-war protestors who attempted to storm the stage in horror at Mr Bush's words, the President continued. "Actually, forget the coin. I've got a better way for deciding," he added and began to sing: "Eeeny meeny miney mo…"

The President's advisers took advantage of a short pause in his speech as he tried to remember the rest of the rhyme to bundle him into his limo and order his driver to remove him, "and the rest of the world", to safety as quickly as possible.

Related articles
Bush beats Republican Guard after Florida recount
Bush attempt to play snap with Iraq's most wanted cards fails
US troops find weapons of Mass Disruption
UK: Syria not next on list for invasion
Pentagon to release Iraq sticker album
Iraq Information Minister awarded comedy BAFTA award
Rumsfeld: There's nothing wrong with a bit of looting
US to ship in crowds of cheering people for Iraq victory celebrations
Iraq information minister to release single
Iraqis deploy shoes of mass destruction
Rumsfeld: Saddam may use WMDs after death
U.S. bombs BBC World Affairs Editor
Baghdad airport captured, tourists expected in weeks
Iraq gun amnesty unsuccessful
Iraq complains of illegal American tactics
Iraqis unimpressed by U.S. replacement for state television
Bush bored with Iraq, declares war on France
U.S. bombs "strategically-important" market
Powell to sell Iraq reconstruction rights on eBay
US to wipe out entire UK armed forces by end 2004
War a ratings winner - better than EastEnders, say fans
Bush achieves war aim #1: Iraq located and bombed
Allied forces encounter "wrong kind of sand"
Shock and awe display not that shocking or awe-inspiring

Oi, down here!


 
Copyright ©2001-2006 DeadBrain. All rights reserved violently.Disclaimer | Privacy Policy | Sheep