 |
|
|
| News · Satire · Spoof · Parody · Humour · Ann Widdecombe |
|
 |
|
| You are puzzled to find: Home > News | 11th February |
| |
|
 Euro Analysis: Why the euro will mean the end of civilisation as we know it 9 Jun 2003 By Linda Lee Goebbels, stereotypical Daily Mail columnist Today, Gordon Brown will announce whether Britain has passed his five so-called economic tests for handing over the last gasp of our great county's sovereignty to the faceless European bureaucrats who already control almost every aspect of our daily lives. The result will almost certainly be that Britain has not passed the tests, but that doesn't stop today from being the most dangerous threat to our daily life since Hitler invaded Poland (bless his soul), and a threat worthy of a five-page editorial rant expounding how close we are to the brink.
One of the great myths about the euro that the government is keen to disseminate is that it will be good for business and good for jobs. Poppycock! The evidence is right in front of our noses across the Channel: if the euro was really that great, why are there literally tens of millions of asylum seekers amassing in French ports trying to get across to the UK? Surely if the euro was a good thing, these evil creatures would stay with the frogs and use it, not try to come across here to wreck our health service? No, the euro is not good for business and it is not good for jobs. The only person it will benefit is the Chancellor of the Exchequer (see above). Even now, as I sit in my humble English cottage that is so much at risk from Brussels interference (one German MEP even rang me up personally yesterday to order me to paint my fence a different colour!) and as I gradually run out of arguments and resort to plain old xenophobic scare-mongering, I can see the dangers the euro presents. It won't just mean the end of our currency, the end of our sovereignty, the end of democracy itself – it will mean the end of what it means to be British. No longer will an Englishman be able to stroll into a quiet country café on a hot summer's day and order a cup of tea and a cream scone and pay for them in pounds sterling. If Brown and his German cronies get their way, we will have to pay in euros with coins that have been scientifically proven to cause cancer, skin irritations and an irrational sense of fear. And, what's more, if some in Brussels get their way tea and cream scones will be banned altogether! That is why you, as a British citizen and a subject of Her Majesty the Queen, must vote No to the single currency – and that you can't even do that yet shouldn't stop you! Related articles Revealed: 5 alternative tests for the euro 13 Jun 2003 In Brief: Government pledges standards improvement over euro test failure 10 Jun 2003 UK to renounce decimal currency, revert to £sd 9 Jun 2003 Euro Analysis: What effect will it have on women's breasts? 9 Jun 2003 Euro Analysis: Why the euro will be the best thing since sliced baguettes 9 Jun 2003 Euro Analysis: Why the euro will mean the end of civilisation as we know it 9 Jun 2003
|
| ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| |
| Copyright ©2001-2006 DeadBrain. All rights reserved violently. | Disclaimer | Privacy Policy | Sheep |