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| News · Satire · Spoof · Parody · Humour · Dick Cheney |
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| You have landed on top of: Home > News | 11th February |
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| Bush hailed as "greatest leader ever"; U.S. discovers irony 20 Jun 2003 by Brad E Stone The concept of irony, which has eluded Americans for over three centuries, was finally discovered by accident last week at state-renowned institution The Los Angeles Research Foundation (The LARF). Senior researcher Dr Zack Bauer remarked, "We first got the idea when we spotted a group of European students giggling stupidly at one of [George Bush] Junior's speeches about 'unelected WMD-wielding maniacs rampaging across the globe and ignoring international consensus'. Well, none of us folk could see what was so darn tootin'. So we decided to investigate. "We had no idea it was irony we were on to at that time... but of course we were just tickled purple when we figured it out." "For years now," explained Professor Patrick Harden of leading British comedy think-tank The Ramsbottom Institute, "the US has defined irony in terms of the Alanis Morrisette song 'Ironic', which, ironically, does not contain one palpable trace of irony. "For instance on rainy wedding days, Americans now will commonly say, 'Oh my Gawd how ironic!' Typically this is repeated for practically any situation, ranging from black flies in Chardonnay to, say, getting run over while wearing new 'sneakers'. "We tried telling them this isn't ironic - just rather unfortunate - but would they listen?" Optimistic observers the length and breadth of Luxembourg have now claimed that it will be "months, not millennia" before Americans discover even more advanced forms of humour such as dry wit and effective sarcasm. "Well it used to be that when folk wanted to say something they didn't think, like to be 'sarcastic' as you'd say, folk'd have to shout 'NOT!' real loud at the end of whatever they were just sayin'!" illuminated Bauer grinning like a monkey. "Now we here just don't reckon that that's no longer strictly necessary. See, if we here at LARF can just figure this out too, well then we'll just be hootin' like hogs, don't ya say?" Given the quality of British televised "comedy" - The Kumars at No 42, Iain "Dunce"an-Smith - as compared to already strong US competition - South Park, Six Feet Under - BBC insiders are said to be "scared incontinent" by these new developments. "British comedy is still the best in the world," quipped a BBC source, "And the BBC are proud to be behind such groundbreaking and original new comedy as 'My Family' and 'My Dad's the Prime Minister'." "Don't laugh!" he later added before hurling his Whiskey bottle at the amassed reporters and exiting the room cursing audibly.
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