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| News · Satire · Spoof · Parody · Humour · Jacques Chirac |
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| You are slobbering over: Home > News | 6th September |
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| An apology to Prime Minister Blair 26 Jul 2003 by Malcolm Drury In an article posted on the DeadBrain web site on July 22nd entitled "Cherie Blair to sing at next year's Eurovision Song Contest", reference was made to two popular songs of the early 70s, "Jack-in-the-Box" and "Puppet on a String". DeadBrain has subsequently received a complaint from 10 Downing Street, alleging that these two song titles were deliberately chosen in order to have a double entendre connotation regarding Prime Minister Blair's relationship with US President "Boy" George W. Bush and possibly Alistair Campbell. In a telephone call to Gregory T. Mullet, DeadBrain's Editor-in-Chief, Douglas Ramsbottom of the Prime Minister's press office said that Mr. Blair is nobody's jack-in-the box or puppet. "This is hack journalism of the most egregious kind. The connotation in the article is clearly that the PM pops out of his box at somebody else's beck and call, and that others are pulling his strings," he complained, "whereas in fact nothing could be farther from the truth. The Prime Minister is his own man. Fully. Well, OK, mostly. Cherie does tend to boss him a bit. Like last night when he wanted to pop down to the Cock and Bull for a couple of pints with Jack Straw, and she told him he had to stay in and fix the kitchen sink. And he daren't answer the phone if it's Clare Short. But other than that, when it comes to matters of State, he's firmly in charge." Mr. Mullet explained that no offence was intended by the entirely random selection of those particular song titles, and released the following statement. "DeadBrain offers its full, unreserved and sincere apologies to Mr. Blair for the article in question, and deeply regrets any anguish or inconvenience it might have caused. No suggestion that Mr. Blair is controlled by others was implied or should be inferred. The author of the article, a hack of no fixed abode, has been sent to stand in the corner for the rest of the day." Mr. Ramsbottom said that that was acceptable, and he would pass it on to Mr. Blair when it was time to go walkies.
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