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Elves sacked in Lapland porn shocker 22 Dec 2003 by Dick Tator In shock news, two elves have reportedly been dismissed from their duties at Santa HQ in Lapland. The elves were called into a disciplinary hearing yesterday after allegations were made against them by Mrs Claus. She allegedly caught them forwarding an e-mail containing explicit photos of Michael Jackson and Mini-Me from the Austin Powers movies in a compromising position and immediately told her husband. A spokesman for Santa Claus said that sacking was the only option available to him. "Mr Claus decided that the position that the two elves were in meant that he had no choice but to terminate them from employment," he said. "Anyone who downloads porn in an area frequently visited by children must be dealt with severely, and he hopes that the example set will ensure there is no repeat of this unfortunate incident." The two elves reportedly accept Santa's decision and are seeking new employment at Michael Jackson's Neverland ranch. Related Articles EU to ban Santa Claus 20 Dec 2003 Christmas Carols: O liberated town of Baghdad 19 Dec 2003 Retailers slam de-commercialisation of Christmas 19 Dec 2003 Disappointed Bush makes own advent calendar 4 Dec 2003
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