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| News · Satire · Spoof · Parody · Humour · Tony Blair |
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| You are passing rapidly through: Home > News | 4th December |
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 New armed forces equipment shortage scandal20 Jan 2004 by J.P. Anyon
Further damaging revelations about the British Armed Forces emerged today after two more soldiers spoke out about how they were "dangerously unequipped" during the recent war in Iraq. One of the Soldiers, Daniel Bryant from Leeds, revealed that not only were many troops without flak jackets, some had even had to give up their own limbs as there were insufficient to go round.
"About three days into the war, it was announced to us that several Americans didn't have right arms, and that it was in the best interests of the coalition if some of the British troops donated theirs," he said. "We were given no choice in the matter – we were just told to hand them over. We were disappointed, naturally, but I felt that if me giving up my body-parts would help us liberate Iraq, then it was worth it." It seems, however, that Mr Bryant's faith was misplaced, and that in actual fact the limbs were taken to be sold in America, where demand for British paraphernalia has increased dramatically over the last few years. It is believed that private collectors will pay in excess of $60,000 for items of this kind. It is yet to be established how the American soldiers were sent to Iraq without the required number of body parts, or why the British soldiers were forced to give up their own, though a joint inquiry has been launched. This is sure to add to the mounting pressure on the Defence Secretary, Geoff Hoon, who has already been called on to resign by the widow of Sgt Steven Roberts, after tapes he made preceding his death showed him bemoaning equipment shortages. The news comes just a week after a group of fire-fighters in Manchester were forced to tackle a warehouse blaze using only their own spit and powers of negotiation. Union bosses described the situation as "disgusting". Related Articles Date not announced for report into deaths of Iraqi civilians 15 Jan 2004 16:25 BBC to ban journalists from reporting news 16 Dec 2003 Tony Blair's reaction to Saddam Hussein's capture 14 Dec 2003 14:46 Iraqi army was unprepared for war, lacked WMD, says report 11 Dec 2003 In Brief: Leaders find common ground in Iraq talks 20 Sep 2003
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