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| You are lounging next to: Home > News | 12th October |
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 Iain Duncan Smith to join cast of Teletubbies12 Feb 2004 by Malcolm Drury
The former interim leader of the Conservative Party, Iain Duncan Smith, is to become a permanent member of the Teletubbies team, joining Tinky Winky, Po, Laa-Laa, Johnny Vaughan and Dipsy, DeadBrain has learned. Mr Duncan Smith will assume the name Dunky Wunky, as Dipsy was already taken.
Douglas Ramsbottom, a BBC spokesman, told our reporter that the makers of the popular programme were very excited to have Mr Duncan Smith aboard. The former alleged leader's experiences of trying to steer the Conservative Party in some direction or other would be invaluable for developing new Teletubbies storylines, he said. Speaking to our reporter an obviously delighted Mr Duncan Smith said that he has agreed to become a regular on the programme to give a behind-the-scenes account of the goings-on in the Houses of Parliament. "After all," he said, "that's a totally surreal place and ideally matched to Teletubby-land so my experience there will be very useful." But he added, "Whilst my contract says I've got to talk a bit about politics, I hope sport and the other things that really matter are what we actually discuss." Mr Ramsbottom said that the makers of the Teletubbies had been very impressed by Mr Duncan Smith's recent one-man show at the Philharmonic Hall in Liverpool, which played to a near-capacity audience of 67, excluding theatre staff, but including journalists. It is well known that Mr Duncan Smith has a great interest in the arts, and is a published and unpublished author of crime thrillers. A Downing Street official, speaking on condition of anonymity, told our reporter upon being informed of Mr Duncan Smith's new role, that the government would be watching the former Tory leader and the BBC very carefully, and at the first hint of any anti-government rhetoric would be coming down hard with the combined force of Alastair Campbell and Lord Hutton. "The Teletubbies must remain completely non-partisan and impartial," he said. "Or else." Related Articles Michael Howard to have cosmetic surgery 18 Jan 2004 Conservative leader auditions for rock group "The Darkness" 2 Jan 2004 Country in total Tory denial 14 Nov 2003 Tories sack HQ in further reshuffle 13 Nov 2003 Howard plans further downsizing of Tory Party 12 Nov 2003
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