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B-Man and The Chancellor locked in power struggle
B-Man, the mysterious masked man who first appeared in London last July with his former assistant David, the Boy Wonder, is today locked in a power struggle with his principal rival, The Chancellor.
B-Man, who wears a red body-hugging spandex outfit with a large B on the chest, and a black cape with the words "Vote Labour", has previously cast himself as the champion of the oppressed and defender of the downtrodden. The caped crusader made one of his rare appearances today to tell reporters that there is only room for one such champion and defender, and that person is he.
He was accompanied by a new assistant whom he called Manifesto Boy, who was wearing a suit similar to that of B-Man but with a large M instead of a B. B-Man explained that owing to some difficulties of a personal nature David, the Boy Wonder, had taken a temporary leave of absence. "But I expect him to be back before long," said B-Man, "and in the meantime Manifesto Boy will be helping me to chart the future to bring truth, justice and the American - er, I mean British - way for all."
It appears that the duo were upset by a series of statements made by The Chancellor today that outline his plan for defending the oppressed in the UK.
"If The Chancellor thinks he's going to plan how to champion the oppressed and whatnot he'd better think again," said Manifesto Boy. "That's my job. And it's B-Man's job to do the championing. End of story." However, B-Man was a little more conciliatory, indicating that it was indeed Manifesto Boy's job now, but that as it used to belong to The Chancellor he believed, with every sinew of his being, that the latter's ideas could be taken into account and even adopted.
"Provided they're the same as mine, of course," he added.
Asked for comment, The Chancellor said that he believed he had made his views clear. "And if B-Man and Manifesto Boy want to make an issue of it tell them I'll be ready for them behind the bike shed," he added, vigorously shaking a cromach.
Meanwhile, B-Man's arch foe, the enigmatic, bespectacled man known only as Michael Who?, dressed head to toe in black, said that he would shortly be issuing the second chapter of his own plan for defending the oppressed, "as soon as we've thought of something to put in it".
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