| |
Head teachers demand 28-day detention
15 Nov 2005
Following last week's vote in the House of Commons on the period of time that police should be allowed to keep possibly dangerous individuals in detention, head teachers are demanding the same rights.
The measures are necessary, they say, to combat the risks posed by increasingly lawless and violent individuals with no respect for the laws or culture of the society they live in.
"Frankly, keeping disruptive pupils in over lunchtime is nowhere near enough," said Dr. Douglas Ramsbottom, principal of a comprehensive school in east London, speaking to us during break time by satellite link-up from the school's heavily fortified staff room. "A whole month would be much better, and if we're also allowed to use the same questioning techniques as Special Branch we might even get some half-decent coursework out of the little blighters."
The National Union of Teachers are confident that 28-day detention will soon become a reality. "Recent events make it clear that the government understands that its task is to pander unthinkingly to the demands of vested interest groups," a union representative told DeadBrain. "This is what teachers want, so that's what the government must give them".
The head teachers are believed to have had a sympathetic hearing from officials within the Department for Education and their proposal may even be incorporated into the forthcoming Education Bill. When asked by journalists whether schools were simply there, like prisons, to keep certain elements of society off the streets, a government spokesman replied, "Yes. No. Wait a minute, is this a trick question? I'll have to get back to you on that one."
DeadBrain's reporter did also ask the two Tory interim leadership candidates for their opinions but mixed up their answers. Or their names. Or possibly both.
The Liberal Democrats were probably available for comment.
Log in to read/write comments on this article
Look at this, moron.
|
|
