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London says goodbye Ken Livingstone's election pledges
London has tearfully bid farewell to the final promise Ken Livingstone made before the last election – that he would keep the popular Routemaster buses in service.
Mr Livingstone, who once said that only a "ghastly, dehumanised moron" would banish the iconic vehicles from the nation's capital, showed what a ghastly, dehumanised moron he was by banishing the iconic vehicles from the nation's capital.
Londoners lined the streets to wave good-bye to the promise, still smarting from the Mayor's other recent u-turn. Londoner Betty Ramsbottom reminisced: "I remember when we said goodbye to the promise to freeze transport fares for four years – do you remember? The promise came before the election. Then just after, all the fares went up. Again."
Campaigners had been hoping to save Ken's promises, but their pleas fell on deaf ears. A City Hall spokesman said, "The campaign to save Ken Livingstone's original pledges will have no effect on us whatsoever. Now empty your pockets, you've got the Olympics to pay for."
When questioned about other promises that had been dispensed with, the spokesman replied:
"Now, come on. There are a lot of promises we did keep. We promised to consult everyone about the Congestion Charge extension, didn't we? We just didn't promise to take any notice of the fact that an overwhelming majority were against it. However we have taken notice of the overwhelming majority of 11% who were against the Routemaster."
The next of Mr Livingstone's promises to be retired is widely believed to be anything that comes out of his mouth.
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Oi, down here!
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