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| News · Satire · Spoof · Parody · Humour · David Blunkett |
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| You don't remotely resemble: Home > News | 5th July |
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 Iraq all God's fault says Blair4 Mar 2006 by Peter Gee
Anti-war campaigners have criticised Tony Blair after he revealed he had prayed to God when deciding whether or not to send UK troops to Iraq in 2003. The admission follows last year's revelation by George Bush that he too was on a mission from God when he launched the invasions of Afghanistan and Iraq.However, in interviews in the British Sunday newspaper 'The News of the World' this weekend, God is expected to deny that he had any involvement with the war and the Devil will claim that he actually owns Tony Blair's soul - after an agreement was made to sell it to him on election night in 1997 in exchange for Margaret Thatcher's brain. God is also expected to launch lawsuits in the British and American courts claiming that both Tony Blair and George Bush have breached a major ten-point contract with him including at least: bearing false witness, coveting and stealing oil, killing, working on a Sunday, and worshipping the media and celebrities. Meanwhile, DeadBrain has learned that there are likely to be further revelations next week when it is expected that several senior Labour Party politicians will announce that their decisions have been influenced by other beings. This is expected to include David Blunkett, who is to say that his dog told him to introduce ID cards, and Charles Clarke, who will announce that he was advised by several omnipotent squirrels in his local park over the issue of the 90-day detention for terror suspects. Meanwhile, both Tony Blair and George Bush were thought to be in shock last night having been advised by the Archbishop of Canterbury, that with Jesus having been born and lived in the Middle East, there was at least a 10% chance that he too was an Arab. Related Articles MI6 wins, JIC loses in intelligence shake-up 24 Mar 2004
B-Man to go to Iraq to look for Saddam's WMDs13 Jan 2004
US gives up on search to find reason for invading Iraq12 Jan 2005
Lord Hutton to withdraw report, apologise to BBC12 Oct 2004
US to invade Greenland to remove threat from lack of WMD7 Oct 2004
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