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25th April
Updated from time to time

Ia splits from Serb in latest Balkan separation

The Balkan region of Ia tonight made an unexpected declaration of independence. The move, announced by the Ia president just a day after Kosovan independence, leaves the former Republic of Yugoslavia reduced to a small section of farmland 16 miles East of Belgrade.

In announcing the move, the Ia president urged "brothers to rejoice at the end of centuries of subjugation at the hands of our evil prefix". Eyewitness at the centre-right Serb Über Ultra Hardcore Real Deal Nationalist Party convention meanwhile described leading Serb politicians as 'totally pissed' at the dramatic turn of events.

As DeadBrain was going to press our correspondent reported that the sound of fireworks in the Ia capital was being punctuated by rocket fire from a nearby Serb militia.

Gregory Mullet, Director of leading think-tank Balkan Watch UK, admitted that Ia's declaration of independence has left most analysts stunned. "After Czechoslovakia split we knew that multi-syllabic countries were a thing of the past," he said. "It was no surprise that Serbia and Montenegro didn't last but Serbia always seemed very stable at two, or maybe three syllables, depending how quickly you say it."

Neighbouring countries were quick to denounce the move. Macedonia, facing the threat of Don separatism, announced it would permanently close its border to the new state.

Montenegro vowed to veto the move at the UN Security Council, having taken sole control of its decision making while much of the world's press was distracted by secret Amy Winehouse photographs.

Chad and Laos were the only countries to officially recognise the new nominally-challenged state of Ia.

The Prime Minister of Saint Vincent and the Grenadines declared he was "flabbergasted" and would not be recognising the new entity.
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